Reunions are so wonderful. That feeling you get driving to pick up your significant other is nothing I have experienced before. You are elated, nervous and proud all at the same time. I literally get those butterflies in my stomach like I’m going on a first date with my husband. You exchange hugs and kisses, leave the base or airport and head home feeling like you are on top of the world.

But the strangest thing about reunions is you literally spend days and months trying to live life independently and then one day (hopefully sooner than later) that person is back in your life on a day-to-day basis. Not that I don’t wish everyday that my husband was home and we were together when he is deployed.

I struggle a bit in my life to keep some of the independence and strength I gained because I realize that he can get deployed again at any moment. It is hard to keep turning on and off that independent/dependent switch.

When my husband is gone, I spend my time focusing on work, my non-profit commitments, the house, the dog, family and friends. When he comes back of course I want to spend as much time with him as possible, that some of the other areas I was focused on begin to lack a bit. But honestly that is probably a good thing for me because I tend to be overly committed to things like work and volunteer responsibilities.

I realize that turning on and off the independent switch is definitely worth it for the time that I do get to spend with my husband. And if this is what he loves doing, I’m going to support him and flip the switch as many times as I need to.